Oliver Stone has just crossed the line from secret fucktard to official practitioner of fucktardery.<\/p>\n
He was still seen, in certain brainless circles, as a compelling storyteller.\u00a0 Even after Wall St 2: The Quickening<\/em>, Alexander<\/em>, World Trade Center<\/em>, W<\/em> (if you like any of these movies you may enjoy my upcoming devotional literature release: Go Fuck Yourself<\/em>) he’s still seen as a name in directing.\u00a0 Savages<\/em> ought to end that.<\/p>\n Before I verbally knock the cock off the man, let me take a moment to put my views on him in perspective.\u00a0 Oliver Stone is an important voice in documentary media.\u00a0 He’s done a couple documentaries on Fidel Castro and Latin America.\u00a0 None of these were particularly good; but what is important is the man can get access to anyone.\u00a0 He’s talked with Colombian revolutionaries, Ahmadinejad, the PLO, Hugo Chavez, Castro, really everyone.\u00a0 Even when I knock his dick off for his shit skill at fiction; I respect the fact that somebody is actually in these places talking to these people in an effort to understand the context of their actions.\u00a0 I can’t really say he’s doing a shitty job, as much as I’d like to, because very few in the media take the sort of personal risk he does so nobody else is really doing what he is.\u00a0 When his documentary series The Untold History of America <\/em>airs; I’ll watch it.\u00a0 I might, and probably will, hate and disagree with it.\u00a0 But I’ll listen to anyone who gets shot at to make a film.<\/p>\n But, overall, I think he’s a nutcase who can’t be trusted to work with fiction anymore.\u00a0 He likes to make films about actual events and just make shit up.\u00a0 Yes, I’m talking about JFK<\/em>.\u00a0 If you’re telling a story that people lived through, you need to adhere a little closer to reality.\u00a0 Stone admitted to changing events to suit his movie.\u00a0 He sees no issue with it.\u00a0 I do.\u00a0 It’s fucking lazy.\u00a0 You either have a fictional story, or you don’t.\u00a0 If people see your fictional story and are given the impression that its actually 100% true; you’re an asshole and a bad writer.\u00a0<\/p>\n And he often has no clue what parts of history are actually compelling.\u00a0 Depicting Alexander the Great’s homosexual relationships was not near as groundbreaking as Oliver obviously thought it was.\u00a0 Everyone knows Alexander boned Hephaestion.\u00a0 We didn’t need to spend 3 hours going “oh my god he was gay!”.\u00a0 I’m pretty sure the movie would have been better served by a sex scene than 3+ hours of man on man droopy eyed romance.\u00a0 People are interested in the man because he conquered the known world at 20something.\u00a0 Who and why he fucked are details, not plot points.\u00a0<\/p>\n Basically, Oliver is a nutcase who has difficulty not doing stupid, insane things with history.\u00a0 So he should stick to documentaries where what happens can be the narrative.\u00a0 He can’t provide one of his own without going off the retard end.<\/p>\n Anyway, Savages <\/em>sucks.\u00a0 Here’s what must have happened:\u00a0 “Ok Oliver, after a year of principle filming we’ve got 100 or so hours of footage of these 3 kids fucking and about 10 minutes of Benicio Del Toro walking around with a mullet.”\u00a0 “Ok, shoot Selma Hayak rolling around in an expensive bed for about a week and I think we got this!”\u00a0 A drug war between an American Zeta-type gang and the Mexican cartel with a bunch of sex ought to have been exciting at some point.\u00a0 But at no point was it.\u00a0 And it has the same ending as Wayne’s World.\u00a0 Where you get to pick from among several endings.\u00a0<\/p>\n The supposed plot is that 2 friends from very different backgrounds start a weed business and also bone the same girl.\u00a0 They are good at their job (one is a business science hippy and the other is an ex-marine or something) and attract the notice (and war!) of the Mexican cartel.\u00a0 Kidnappings and violence ensue.\u00a0 Yet at no time was anything on screen worth watching.\u00a0 I suppose some of the girls might like the fleeting shots of man ass, but you should probably see Magic Mike <\/em>instead.<\/p>\n Stay away from fiction, Oliver you fucktard.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Oliver Stone has just crossed the line from secret fucktard to official practitioner of fucktardery. He was still seen, in certain brainless circles, as a compelling storyteller.\u00a0 Even after Wall St 2: The Quickening, Alexander, World Trade Center, W (if … Continue reading